The SPAM-ku Glossary
For uninitiated SPAM-ku folks, here is a guide to SPAM-ku vocabulary. The list seems to grow every year, so keep checking back and soon you will be conversing like a SPAM-ku pro.
For uninitiated SPAM-ku folks, here is a guide to SPAM-ku vocabulary. The list seems to grow every year, so keep checking back and soon you will be conversing like a SPAM-ku pro.
APORKALYPSE - That fateful day when SPAM will become unavailable to the masses and there will be much sadness throughout the land.
BONGOS - The finest choice of instrument to be played while reading SPAM-ku.
GOOD BOOK, THE - SPAM-ku: Tranquil Reflections on Luncheon Loaf, edited, compiled and written by John Nagamichi Cho (Harper Perennial, New York, 1998). The book that was gifted to Mr. Montoya on the fateful night that he began the traditions of SPAM-ku Week at La Habra High School.
MAD SPRINCH, THE - The name of the heretical sprinch who wrote SPAM-ku disguising himself until the SPAM-ku Week Tasting Party. He revealed himself and walked out. The following year, he recanted, repented, and knelt before the class and kissed the SPAMalele as a show of remorse.
MAPS - SPAM spelled backward, MAPS describes the negative feelings and attitudes that one has toward all things SPAM-ku. People with extreme MAPS can end up becoming a sprinch, but not without hope.
Q-KU - SPAM-ku written specifically about SPAM and the 2020 Corona Virus Pandemic quarantine.
S.H.A.M. - The SPAM Haiku Archive Master, originally Mr. John Nagamichi Cho who later conferred S.H.A.M status on Mr. David V. Montoya.
S.H.A.M.E. - What John Nagamichi Cho became after he conferred S.H.A.M status upon D. V. Montoya - SPAM Haiku Archive Master Emeritus.
SNAPPING - The only appropriate response upon hearing a juicy piece of SPAM-ku.
SPACOMMPLICES - SPAM accomplices who aid and abet sprinchesk and sprinch-wannabees in doing their dastardly deeds.
SPAMALELE - The SPAM ukulele that is played in SPAM-ku ceremonies, rites and rituals.
SPAMBASSADOR - A person with SPAMcerity so great that they spread the love of SPAM-ku to other countries.
SPAMCERITY - SPAM sincerity. Enough said.
SPAM HATERS - One of three kinds of people in the world, the hate SPAM luncheon meat, but not necessarily SPAM-ku.
SPAMIRACLE - A SPAM miracle that usually occurs during SPAM-ku Week. For example, when Juan Hernandez recanted his hate for all things SPAM-ku. He confessed his deep love for SPAM-ku in his final year at LHHS after he had been banned for 6 years due to his sprinchy ways!
SPAM-KU - A SPAM-themed poem following the Japanese tradition of haiku writing. 3 lines of 5, 7 and 5 syllables each.
SPAM-KU IN ABSENTIA - The only SPAM-ku written at a SPAM-ku Week Tasting Party that was never read. It was set ablaze during the party after the discovery that the sprinch who wrote it planned to read it aloud and denigrate SPAM-ku. He was discovered in time, ejected from the party and his heretical SPAM-ku was destroyed. (See SPAM-ku Archive No. 1077.)
SPAM-KU GLOSSARY - the SPAM-ku glossary, i.e. this page. Duh.
SPAM LOVERS - One of three types of people in the world, these people love SPAM but not necessarily SPAM-ku.
SPAM NEVER-TASTERS - One of three types of people in the world, these people have never tasted SPAM. Poor souls. That is why we started the annual SPAM-ku Week Tasting Party to benefit them.
SPAM ROYALTY - Various titles conferred on the SPAM-ku faithful for their extraordinary SPAM sincerity. SPrincess (SPAMantha Stapish), SPuchess (Jessica King), and SPuke (Sir George Saponjyan) are fine examples.
SPANGER - When SPAM is in danger, i.e. there is a plot to steal it. (See. SPAM-ku Archive No. 976)
SPARRIOR - A SPAM-ku warrior! (See SPAM-ku Archive No. 977)
SPERO - A SPAM-ku lover who does heroic deeds, usually to thwart the misdeeds of sprinches and would-be sprinches.
SPODISATTVAS - SPAM-ku saints who do heroic deeds in the name of all things SPAM-ku.
SPODYGUARDS - SPAM-ku lovers who protect SPAM-ku Week and it's SPeros, SPosdisattavas, SPAM royalty, the good book SPAM-ku: Tranquil Reflections on Luncheon Loaf, the SPAM-ku archive, the S.H.A.M and the S.H.A.M.E.
SPOMEN - A SPAM omen that appears in honor of SPAM-ku Week. For example, one year a SPAM-pink balloon was found floating in the classroom just as SPAM-ku Week began. No one knows how it got there, and no one knows why it disappeared as soon as SPAM-ku Week ended.
SPUCHESS - A SPAM-ku Duchess, i.e. Jessica King
SPUKE - A SPAM-ku Duke, i.e. George Saponjyan
SPUTT-CRACK - Self-explanatory. (See SPAM-ku Archive No. 975)
SPRIMINALS - People with MAPS, would-be sprinches, and actual sprinches who resort to lives of crime by stealing SPAM-ku artifacts such as the good book, SPAM-ku: Tranquil Reflections on Luncheon Loaf, the SPAMalele, or even actual cans of SPAM!
SPRINCESS - A SPAM-ku Princess, i.e. SPAMantha Stapish.
SPRINCH - A SPAM-ku grinch is a person who develops such a bad case of MAPS that they will do anything to thwart the peaceful SPAM-ku Week, it's people and it's festivities. The title sprinch is always spelled with lower case letters as a sprinch should never be celebrated in any way, not even with a capital letter.
SPRIVATE EYES - SPAM-ku private eyes who secretly help to track down sprinches.
SPRODIGAL SON - Again, Juan Hernandez was banned for 6 years for his sprinchy ways. He renounced his evil ways in his senior year, wrote some beautifully sincere SPAM-ku, and was named the first SPAM Prodigal Son. (See SPAM-ku Archive No. 552)
BONGOS - The finest choice of instrument to be played while reading SPAM-ku.
GOOD BOOK, THE - SPAM-ku: Tranquil Reflections on Luncheon Loaf, edited, compiled and written by John Nagamichi Cho (Harper Perennial, New York, 1998). The book that was gifted to Mr. Montoya on the fateful night that he began the traditions of SPAM-ku Week at La Habra High School.
MAD SPRINCH, THE - The name of the heretical sprinch who wrote SPAM-ku disguising himself until the SPAM-ku Week Tasting Party. He revealed himself and walked out. The following year, he recanted, repented, and knelt before the class and kissed the SPAMalele as a show of remorse.
MAPS - SPAM spelled backward, MAPS describes the negative feelings and attitudes that one has toward all things SPAM-ku. People with extreme MAPS can end up becoming a sprinch, but not without hope.
Q-KU - SPAM-ku written specifically about SPAM and the 2020 Corona Virus Pandemic quarantine.
S.H.A.M. - The SPAM Haiku Archive Master, originally Mr. John Nagamichi Cho who later conferred S.H.A.M status on Mr. David V. Montoya.
S.H.A.M.E. - What John Nagamichi Cho became after he conferred S.H.A.M status upon D. V. Montoya - SPAM Haiku Archive Master Emeritus.
SNAPPING - The only appropriate response upon hearing a juicy piece of SPAM-ku.
SPACOMMPLICES - SPAM accomplices who aid and abet sprinchesk and sprinch-wannabees in doing their dastardly deeds.
SPAMALELE - The SPAM ukulele that is played in SPAM-ku ceremonies, rites and rituals.
SPAMBASSADOR - A person with SPAMcerity so great that they spread the love of SPAM-ku to other countries.
SPAMCERITY - SPAM sincerity. Enough said.
SPAM HATERS - One of three kinds of people in the world, the hate SPAM luncheon meat, but not necessarily SPAM-ku.
SPAMIRACLE - A SPAM miracle that usually occurs during SPAM-ku Week. For example, when Juan Hernandez recanted his hate for all things SPAM-ku. He confessed his deep love for SPAM-ku in his final year at LHHS after he had been banned for 6 years due to his sprinchy ways!
SPAM-KU - A SPAM-themed poem following the Japanese tradition of haiku writing. 3 lines of 5, 7 and 5 syllables each.
SPAM-KU IN ABSENTIA - The only SPAM-ku written at a SPAM-ku Week Tasting Party that was never read. It was set ablaze during the party after the discovery that the sprinch who wrote it planned to read it aloud and denigrate SPAM-ku. He was discovered in time, ejected from the party and his heretical SPAM-ku was destroyed. (See SPAM-ku Archive No. 1077.)
SPAM-KU GLOSSARY - the SPAM-ku glossary, i.e. this page. Duh.
SPAM LOVERS - One of three types of people in the world, these people love SPAM but not necessarily SPAM-ku.
SPAM NEVER-TASTERS - One of three types of people in the world, these people have never tasted SPAM. Poor souls. That is why we started the annual SPAM-ku Week Tasting Party to benefit them.
SPAM ROYALTY - Various titles conferred on the SPAM-ku faithful for their extraordinary SPAM sincerity. SPrincess (SPAMantha Stapish), SPuchess (Jessica King), and SPuke (Sir George Saponjyan) are fine examples.
SPANGER - When SPAM is in danger, i.e. there is a plot to steal it. (See. SPAM-ku Archive No. 976)
SPARRIOR - A SPAM-ku warrior! (See SPAM-ku Archive No. 977)
SPERO - A SPAM-ku lover who does heroic deeds, usually to thwart the misdeeds of sprinches and would-be sprinches.
SPODISATTVAS - SPAM-ku saints who do heroic deeds in the name of all things SPAM-ku.
SPODYGUARDS - SPAM-ku lovers who protect SPAM-ku Week and it's SPeros, SPosdisattavas, SPAM royalty, the good book SPAM-ku: Tranquil Reflections on Luncheon Loaf, the SPAM-ku archive, the S.H.A.M and the S.H.A.M.E.
SPOMEN - A SPAM omen that appears in honor of SPAM-ku Week. For example, one year a SPAM-pink balloon was found floating in the classroom just as SPAM-ku Week began. No one knows how it got there, and no one knows why it disappeared as soon as SPAM-ku Week ended.
SPUCHESS - A SPAM-ku Duchess, i.e. Jessica King
SPUKE - A SPAM-ku Duke, i.e. George Saponjyan
SPUTT-CRACK - Self-explanatory. (See SPAM-ku Archive No. 975)
SPRIMINALS - People with MAPS, would-be sprinches, and actual sprinches who resort to lives of crime by stealing SPAM-ku artifacts such as the good book, SPAM-ku: Tranquil Reflections on Luncheon Loaf, the SPAMalele, or even actual cans of SPAM!
SPRINCESS - A SPAM-ku Princess, i.e. SPAMantha Stapish.
SPRINCH - A SPAM-ku grinch is a person who develops such a bad case of MAPS that they will do anything to thwart the peaceful SPAM-ku Week, it's people and it's festivities. The title sprinch is always spelled with lower case letters as a sprinch should never be celebrated in any way, not even with a capital letter.
SPRIVATE EYES - SPAM-ku private eyes who secretly help to track down sprinches.
SPRODIGAL SON - Again, Juan Hernandez was banned for 6 years for his sprinchy ways. He renounced his evil ways in his senior year, wrote some beautifully sincere SPAM-ku, and was named the first SPAM Prodigal Son. (See SPAM-ku Archive No. 552)